I woke up this morning feeling exhausted from a weekend full of overwhelming emotions..
If you are a fellow sufferer of anxiety or depression, you know exactly the feeling I am talking about.
Last night I had a much needed talk with God.
For the first time ever, I begged for God to take away the nervous pit that has taken up residency in my stomach.
I prayed that he would rid me of this sick and eerie feeling. I am tired of it.
I, for the first time, asked God to take my anxiety away….
I am a person of strong faith.. I hate praying for things in my life to get better.
At this point, I felt that I had no other option.
Of course, after I asked God these things.. I felt so guilty.
I apologized to God.. I told Him that if my life was supposed to be consumed by this “mental suffering”, I am content.
I told God that if my suffering is for the sake of helping others or saving someone’s life.. I am content.
I asked God for the strength to suffer.
Suffer is such a brutal word, but that is what anxiety/ depression feels like. You are suffering.
It is a constant and unwavering battle.. Me against anxiety… Me against depression.. Me against myself.
I know that God will help me. He tells me in His word that I only need to cast my anxiety and fears on Him.
He will help me overcome.
I WILL OVERCOME
Not by myself…. But with HIM!
I am thankful for another day. Even when things feel tough…
I am alive.